


Don't Tease the Tsundere

by brotherfuckers



Series: Striderclan [28]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Bondage, Creampie, Dirty Talk, Foursome - M/M/M/M, Gags, Handcuffs, Incest, M/M, Multi, Multiple Orgasms, Rough Sex, Sibling Incest, Spanking, Stridercest - Freeform, Teasing, Threesome - M/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-26
Updated: 2013-08-26
Packaged: 2017-12-24 10:00:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/938622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brotherfuckers/pseuds/brotherfuckers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>D calls Bro cute in a bid to get a quick fuck. It doesn’t go according to plan and D gets used by all of his brothers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Tease the Tsundere

“Hey Bro?”

Bro swings his head around to where D is standing at the fridge. “Whad’ya want now?”

“When was the last time you won a strife?”

“What?” He makes the effort to fully turn around in his seat. “Recently.” He waves a hand in the air. “I fucked Dave with a couple smuppets for a personal vid.”

“That was two weeks ago.”

“Really?”

“You haven’t won a strife since then.”

“So?”

“You’ve lost four times since then.”

“With you bein’ at least three of them, ya low scum cheater.”

“You want to know what I think-”

“Not really, Couldn’t care less.” Bro waves him off and returns to his work.

“I think you are cute when you lose.”

“What?” Bro turns sharply to look at his older brother like D had just grown tentacles while wearing a jester hat, disbelief heavy in his tone of voice. “What?”

“I think you are cute.” D grins over at him.

“Bitch, I’ll cut you.”

“Sure you will, with your cute little knife.” D fucking saunters over where Bro is seated.

Bro’s eyes narrow. “You wanna see me win a strife? Then get your skinny fucker self up to the roof now.” He stands up. But finds D sliding up to his side with one hand dancing around the front of his waist. His lips near Bro’s ears.

“You are just. Too. Cute.”

Bro splutters and reaches for D but finds only air as D flashsteps away. “Son of a fuck,” Bro growls out. Suddenly there is a presence pressed up against his back.

“Big Bad Bro.”

He whirls around but his legs catch against the chair he was just sitting in.

“Aw, look at you.” He glares at D’s cheshire grin across the room. “You are so adorable when you are flustered and confused.”

“Fuck you.” Bro shoves the chair out of the way and stalks over to D.

“Are you... are you blushing?”

“NO I AM NOT! And you can’t prove anything.” Bro ducks his head to shade his face with the brim of his hat.

“Holy shit, this is rich. But you can’t fight the fact you are just so squishy cute! And I am pretty sure I do have proof. Especially with that file.”

Bro stops in his tracks. “What file?”

“Oh, just that one on your computer that you try to keep locked, but the password was kinda nostalgic. Mom’s birthday? Really? Is that the best protection you could come up with for a file full of those compromising pictures. I mean just think of the scandal when people learn that Big Bad Bro keeps a file full of pictures of the ‘li’l shits’ and me and Mom and Rose and Roxy from when we were little. Even has your favorite memories in the park with the twins when they were toddlers. You looked good all covered in dirt with boogers hanging from your shirt when you played with them. You really are so adorable. Your, like, worst secret is that you made a little electronic scrapbook of all of us.”

“I-I did not!”

An orange object darts about the room.

i found it!!!! hehehe!

“Good boy, Hal.”

“Imma-” Bro is cut off by the electronic crackle of the wide screen being turned on and a sweet pop song floating out of the stereo. Three faces fill up the screen. Two slightly chubby ones pressed up against a slightly younger Bro’s as apparently he took the picture of them at the playground according to the little bits of the background that shows through. It is soon replaced by a photo of a network of yarn strewn across a couch with D and Dave serving as makeshift looms for Rose’s knitting project. The next has Roxy hanging onto Dirk’s back as he apparently gives her a ride through a park. The next one has the two oldest boys flanking their mother with a gorgeous sunset landscape behind them from back when D was just at her shoulder.

Hal dodges Bro’s swipe through the air. “You little rat bastard. Imma gonna disassemble ya and sell ya for scrap.”

I am backed up to the internet now! Sorry Bro! You cannot do anything to me that I could not repair. Mwhahahaha. The laughter lost some of its effect through the small vocal box of the Sprite chassis.

“Wanna bet?” Bro’s tone is dangerous and makes Hal hover just out of reach. “I taught Dirk most of the basics to coding and bots. He did get beyond me, but I got favors with Roxy that I can cash in.”

Ah. Um. Ah. The cheesy song stops playing but the slideshow doesn’t stop as the little bot zips away to safety.

“Now, Bro, don’t threaten the tiny digital lifeform. Just embrace your natural moe tendencies.”

“What.” D can almost hear Bro’s jaw drop. “I am not fuckin’ moe. And I will fuck you up if you even think about saying kawaii.”

“There, there, you little tsundere. We all love you anyways.”

Bro just gapes at D, stunned at the absolute balls his brother is showing in the face of near death threats. D’s grin gets bigger. Slowly Bro reins himself in. D is just doing this to get a reaction. Oh he is getting a reaction alright.

“You want a treat, you cute boy?” D teases as he materializes a stick of pocky from his sleeve to his hand, waving it out in front of Bro who instantly sees red.

“I’ll show you cute, you fucker,” Bro growls before launching himself at his brother.

“Gotta catch me first, Big Bad!” D taunts as he flashsteps away. Bro stays after him and almost snags his hand when D uses it to launch himself over the back of the futon. Bro vaults after him a second later to almost trap him against the fridge, but D manages to slip away by stepping up onto the counter and pushing Bro off balance. Once again Bro just barely misses him as he dives over the kitchen table to cut D off when D tries to dart around. D tries for another lap when suddenly he is grabbed, snatched to a full stop with a thick arm around his waist out of the air. He is momentarily tossed around but finds his bearings once again with the familiar position of being bent over the couch.

With practiced ease, Bro pulls D’s pants down off his ass and to his thighs. D squirms a little which just comes across as a cute little wiggle. Bro’s hands cup the presented cheeks briefly before dipping between them for a teasing brush.

He’s startled to feel the skin around D’s entrance already slick. D bucks his hips up with a wanton moan as Bro presses a finger and finds him already pretty prepared as if D was planning this all along.

“You teasin’ little shit. You planned this. Imma fuckin’... argh!” The loud crack of hand hitting ass fills the room, surprising both of them. D yelps and Bro just grins to himself. He hadn’t intended on this kind of punishment, but it’s fitting and could be some good payback. Let’s see D call him cute after this. _Smack!_

“Bro! What are  you doi-” _Smack!_ “Bro, Derrick! Wa-” _Smack!_ “Oh shi-” _Smack!_

“Let’s play a game, brother.”

“Play a gam-” _Smack!_ “This isn’t fa-” _Smack!_ “I’m not Da-” _Smack!_ "Oh god my as-" _Smack!_ "Please I’m so-" _Smack!_ "So sorr-" _Smack!_ "Ah! Fucking he-" _Smack!_ "Bloody fu-" _Smack!_ "You fuck-" _Smack!_ "I’m going to-" _Smack!_

Bro waits for D to finish his threat but he seems to have wised up to the ‘game’ he was playing. So he tries another tactic.

He shoves two fingers in, making D arch up underneath his pinning hand. “You like this game? You think this is fun?” He works his fingers in and out as D quivers for him. “You think you can tease me and get away with it? You think you can plan shit like this?” D doesn’t even try to answer he just pushes back against Bro’s hand, whimpering as Bro withdraws.

“Bro-” D tries to whine before he is cut off with another spank.

“Just-” _Smack!_ “Fuck-” _Smack!_ “Me-” _Smack!_ “Already!” _Smack!_

When Bro looks down at how nicely red and hot D’s ass looks, he can’t help but oblige. He quickly drops his pants and slips into D like he’s coming home. D gasps as the edges of Bro’s pants rub up against the heated abused flesh of his ass but moans as Bro immediately sets a fast pace. Bro seems to be taking special care to press his hips fully against D’s stinging ass, but D doesn’t dare complain in case Bro decides to start spanking him again.

However, he can’t help the moans that bubble up as his dick is caught and rubbed against the couch. D tries not to let any words slip but when Bro changes the angle of his thrusts and starts ramming into his prostate every few strokes he can’t help but start babbling between gasps. “Oh fuck. Oh god. Bro, please. Fuck! Harder, please please please. Feels so good. So much better than my fingers did. Couldn’t wait for you - _ah_ \- to bend me over. Please!”

Bro cuts off any more rambling by picking up the pace and gripping D’s hips harder to push him deeper into the back of the couch. Bro groans at the way he clenches and writhes, trying to push back into his thrusts and get more friction on his neglected dick. D is pressing whines and moans into the cushions in a failed attempt to keep from being as loud. Bro knows there will still probably be noise complaints come tomorrow, but like hell does he care right now.

He feels D starting to tremble and tense up around him and decides to help his brother over the edge. “Such a fuckin’ whore D. Plannin’ this out so ya could have me bend ya over and fuck ya stupid. Didn’ even wanna wait for me to prep ya. Had to have it right, fuckin’, then.” Bro punctuates the last three words with especially harsh thrusts and moves one of his hands to pinch at D’s reddened cheeks. That’s all it takes to make D lose it with a loud moan that pitches slightly higher when Bro continues to fondle his abused ass.

Bro continues to thrust while D is spasming around his dick, then buries himself as deep as he can and presses himself against D’s back when he starts to come. He only groans louder when D starts wriggling and whimpering, trying to get Bro to back off his ass, which is probably feeling pretty sore now that D has climaxed and isn’t distracted by pleasure anymore.

“Quit your wigglin’ or I’ll continue the game we were playin’ earlier, ya manipulative bastard.” D whines lightly in response, not sure if actual words would trigger a spank or not. But he does still and waits for Bro to slowly pull out. He doesn’t straighten up as Bro’s splayed hand never leaves his back and just keeps him pressed over the back of the couch. D tries to look up when he feels the hand shift, turning on his back as Bro seemingly moves around to the front of the futon without letting him up.

“Bro?”

“Shush.” That does not reassure D at all. Instead his eyes go wide as he sees Bro reach under the couch and even wider when he hears the rattle of the chains that D knows belongs to the cuffs that are frequently used before and during the action part of sex and so why is Bro bringing them out at the end?

“Wha- What are you doing, Bro?”

He knows it is too late to struggle when the first band snaps around his wrist but he does so anyways, hoping to bring his legs around to the same side of the futon as his upper half. But the long gangly nature of his legs prevents that by the time Bro has fastened the second one and is returning to the back. Somewhere in the back of his mind, D is somewhat awed at how well Bro accomplished the task of clipping his hands to the futon with only one hand.

“Bro! God damnit, Br-” _Smack!_ D freezes up at the spank as sharp pain goes through his already sore ass. D kicks out at him, but only gets another _Smack!_ for his pains.

The hand on his back finally moves but to D’s horror it just slides over his ass and down his leg to grab his ankle, with the other sliding down to match it, to tug his jeans all the way off. There are more sounds from another set of chains and cuffs as Bro pulls them from under the futon to bind his legs on the wrong side.

D twists and flails with the little room he is given but it is not enough to do more than try to find a comfortable position and raise himself up just enough to turn and glare at Bro.

“You fucking bastard. Let me go right now. This is beyond what is called for. I called you cute, so sue me, but don’t you dare take it out on my poor, mangled, abused, sore, suffering ass!” Bro just calmly walks around the room, keeping one hand at his waist to keep his pants up. “I demand you release me, you dastardly fiend! Seriously. This is getting old. Getting old real fast. I got cum all up my ass and you are just standing there smugly and what the fuck do you have in your hand? Oh fuck no. No no no n-mph!” Bro fastens the ball gag’s straps around the back of D’s head. “MRF NRF!”

“I’m sorry. Ya gotta speak up, sweetheart.”

“MMMNNRRR!” _Smack!_ “MMRR!” _Smack!_

D fights his restraints a moment more before finally giving up and collapsing on the back of the couch. He watches Bro move around the apartment. Bro finally sheds his clothes when it gets to be too obnoxious (he doesn’t do anything about D’s t-shirt bunched up around his shoulders) right before picking up what looks to be a spare pair of shades. But as he taps the corner, D realizes those are _those_ shades. He starts shaking his head and making more muffled sounds as Bro returns.

“Here, you can be in the company of your co-traitor.”

Hello, D.

“MRRRFF!”

It seems I have a command waiting for me.

Indulge the fucker in dirty talk.

I can do that.

What a sweet sexy ass. All nice and red. And dripping white. God, that’s hot. You really liked Bro’s big dick. Pounding you against the futon after teasing him into it. You totally deserved what you got. You’re his bitch. It’s amazing how naughty you are when you aren’t even trying. Legs spread and bound up, unable to do anything about it. Letting anyone see you spread and wanting, because I know you are still wanting. You are such a whore for your brothers’ cocks. All three of them. You love letting them fuck you until you can’t even walk. I’ve recorded the way you sound, and you are so much better than any porn star out there...

“Mmnnn...” _Smack!_

* * *

When the front door swings open close to an hour later, Dirk and Dave find D still strapped over the back of the futon with his ass cherry red from Bro’s continued ministrations.

“Wow.”

“He deserved it,” Bro calls out over his shoulder from where he was working naked at his desk.

“Don’t really care. He just looks damn good.” Dirk sets his stuff down and slowly gravitates over to D. He admires Bro’s handiwork and lays a hand gently on the small of D’s back to make sure he’s okay. D turns as best he can to look at Dirk over his shoulder and whines pitifully around the gag in his mouth. Dirk tilts his head with a puzzled look when he sees that D is wearing Hal’s shades, which appear to be running line after line of script on the glass. He plucks them off D’s face and takes a closer look to find that the screen is completely full of dirty talk, and even though he has no idea what caused Bro to do this, Dirk can appreciate the masterful and simple torture D must be going through.

D looks up hopefully at him, until he see’s Dirk start to smirk and he whimpers loudly when Dirk slides his hand down and fondles his poor ass. “You done with him for now or did you have something else planned in this elaborate and well-deserved punishment, Bro?”

“Well, I did have some more torture planned,” Bro muses from his desk, “definitely included you boning him though, so have at it.” They share a very evil smirk and Bro tosses a tube of lube at Dirk, who is already undoing his pants and sliding a couple fingers into D’s abused hole. D arches and makes a pitifully high pitched sound, which only turns into a drawn out whine when Dirk quickly adds a third finger.

“So loose and still so slick, D. I’m not even sure I’ll need any lube between what’s left here mixed in with Bro’s cum. And I bet you’re hard and dripping too aren’t you?” Dirk sneaks a hand under D’s hips and confirms his suspicions and earns himself a low groan from D, “Wonder how long it took you to get hard again after Bro finished you off the first time, you slut? Couldn’t help it, could you? Not with Li’l Hal flashing such dirty messages up at you, reminding you of how spread open you are and how your brother’s cum looks, slowly dripping out of you.” Dirk grins at the sweet keens coming from D behind the gag and how his body tries to lean into Dirk’s none-too-gentle touches.

Dirk withdraws his fingers and slicks his cock up a little with the lube Bro threw at him just to make sure he doesn’t hurt his brother. He leans up against D’s reddened ass making him wriggle and writhe before he asks, “It isn’t enough for you, is it D? Not enough to be fucked and splayed out like a cheap hooker? You want more, don’t you D? You want my dick too right?” D sobs and nods his head and attempts to push back against Dirk’s cock where he’s holding it teasingly at D’s entrance. “I’m not sure you deserve it, D. Why should I give it to trash like you, huh? Beg for me, D, and maybe I’ll be nice and fuck your whore ass.”

A full body shiver goes through D as he gasps and whines pitifully trying to beg with his body and make sounds around the gag. “MMRRR. WWWAAARRMPH IIIIIIRRRRRRR MAARRRPH!” Dirk takes pity on him finally and slides in with one smooth motion causing both of them to groan. D is already so opened and lubed from whatever Bro did to him that Dirk doesn’t even pause before he sets up a punishing pace.

Dave finishes putting away their bags before wandering over to drape himself across Bro’s back while listening to the sounds of Dirk pounding away at D’s ass. His fingers caress over Bro’s pectorals when Bro finally turns his head to kiss Dave. He breaks from soft lips to glance over at the copulating brothers when he hears D’s muffled moans kick up a notch.

“Somewhat hot and bothered, Dirk?”

“Yea, a little,” Dirk replies breathily. “Have you seen Dave’s ass in those jeans?”

Instead of looking, Bro reaches behind him and palms the ass in question before grabbing a belt loop and pulling the young Strider into this lap.

“Been a li’l tease, have ya brat?” Dave only answers with a kiss and a suggestive wiggle.

“See? Just like that.” Dirk emphasizes each word with a hard deep thrust that make the chains securing D to the futon rattle before returning to the fast quick pace that left D breathless. The staccato sounds from their fucking fills the air as Bro undresses the Strider in his lap, stealing kisses and nips as he goes. Their attention refocuses on Dirk as his breathing shifts into broken pants between rambles of how nice D’s whore ass feels around his cock and how much of a cock tease his brothers are and how nice it is to come home finding D bent over the couch already used and ready for more action. Bro and Dave hear the low moan that comes from D as his body stiffens and he paints another stain on the back of the futon.

Dirk throws his head back with blind pleasure as D’s body tightens up around his cock making each slick thrust that much sweeter. His hands grip D’s hips tighter as he keeps up the punishing pace, pushing D through his orgasm only trailing a couple moments before he arches over D’s now limp back, spilling himself into his older brother to add to the mess in his ass.

He rests there for a moment to get his breath back. Both of them shudder with post orgasmic tremors with Dirk kissing the back of D’s neck until he finally straightens up and slides out with a moan. He somehow gracefully tumbles over the back of the futon to land on the soft cushions to D’s jealousy and slight panic.

“Just gonna leave him there, Dirk? Ya sure know how to treat a lady,” Bro comments from the side.

“Are you really done with him?”

“Not at all.”

“Then why the fuck are you commenting? Dave, your turn to get your dick wet.”

“Hrm?” Dave pulls his head up from where he had been nuzzling Bro’s neck.

“C’mon Davey. You’re part of the punishment too. Dun want the skinny fucker walkin’ for a week.”

“Do I have to?” Dave whines.

Bro catches his ear lobe in his teeth and murmurs at a volume the other two can’t hear, “Ya wanna make daddy happy, dontcha?” He gives Dave’s cock two strokes before shoving him off his lap.

Dave shoots a frown over his shoulder towards Bro, but does get behind D who is still limp over his previous orgasm. Dave appreciates the work that the other two have done on his ass and follows Dirk’s lead, slicking his cock up with a small amount lube before sliding into the eldest Strider. D arches up at the intrusion with his eyes nearly rolling back into his head.

Dave moans at the enveloping heat and the fullness he can feel from Bro’s and Dirk’s loads already inside. D relaxes back down as Dave takes a much slower pace for his thrusts. He pauses each time he pulls almost all the way out before sinking until he’s flush where he pauses again. His hands trace out the sore muscles of D’s quivering legs and back. He leans forward to lay along D’s spine while rocking his hips to a smooth soothing rhythm.

“D, D, D. You look so good like that.” Dirk flops himself from the end of the futon over towards D. “All drooling and sexed up. You like it when Dave fucks you, don’t you? It’s a rare occurrence, but damn his dick is nice, isn’t it? Good length, good girth, touches you in all the right places. His ass might be a touch better but you can’t deny that cock.”

“Mmmmnnn.”

“Exactly.” Dirk reaches up and wipes away some of the drool from around the gag and kisses his cheek. “Such a sweet boy, D. Whatever did you do to big ol’ mean Bro to make him do this to you?” Dirk nuzzles him and strokes his hair.

D moans lowly again as his body starts to react to the slow steady pace of Dave’s fucking and Dirk’s words. Dave wraps his arms around D’s chest and presses his lips across his back as Dirk kisses along his cheek and neck.

“Nope. Nuh uh. This ain’t no pity party for the bastard,” Bro declares as he pushes up out of his seat. He comes up behind Dave with the lube in hand, quickly uncapping it and squirting some onto his fingers. “Guess I gotta show ya how to fuck. Gotta teach ya e’erythin’, don’t I?”

Dave gasps as Bro’s fingers slip into his crack and press up against his entrance with steady pressure until the first slips inside. Dave’s hips stutter but Bro uses his other hand to smooth his motion. He works his finger in counter to Dave’s thrusts until Dave is slick and relaxed enough to add a second. And then a third and Dave’s hands aren’t as gentle on D anymore as Dave tries to balance the sensations of D around his cock and Bro fingering his ass.

He gets a moment reprieve as Bro removes his fingers to lube up his cock before pressing up against Dave who is pressed deep into D who responds with a groan. Bro is patient just enough to let Dave’s body accommodate his dick before using his hands on Dave’s hips to move the young Strider back and forth between his cock and D’s ass. The pace quickly ramps up to faster than what Dave had been doing with corresponding moans and grunts to go along.

D is getting tense again as the harsher thrusts from Bro are communicated through Dave. He starts thrashing his head around, unable to verbalize any of his desires (though he’s not sure if he would be asking for them to stop or fuck him harder if he was given a voice).

“Poor, D. Poor baby, let me take that gag off of you,” Dirk murmurs to him as he gets up on his knees. Bro gives him a warning look over Dave’s arched back but Dirk just smirks back up at him and continues to undo the strap holding the ball gag in place. He tosses it away and gently cups D’s chin as D stretches the sore muscles and finally lets them relax. “Come on now, D, don’t close your mouth just yet. Look at what a slut you are. Open you mouth for me,” Dirk coos at him while slipping a thumb between his lips and pushing his jaw back open while the words settle in D’s brain. “I know you want to have another dick in you, don’t you. One at a time just isn’t enough for you, is it?” D’s eyes go wide as Dirk lets his head drop down just enough to be on level with his new erection. The thumb in his mouth and still in shock at Dirk’s sudden change in tone without actually changing his tone prevent D from issuing any complaints as Dirk feeds him his dick. Instead he just uses the saliva that had built up behind the ball gag to wet Dirk with his tongue until Dirk finally removes his hand. Then D’s lips press tightly around his shaft even as Dirk begins to thrust counter to the beat coming from behind the futon.

Dirk gets to watch as Dave finally looks down and notices that Dirk is fucking D’s mouth as he is fucking D’s ass and being fucked by Bro and just loses it. There was no build up of moans, just a sudden shudder and a sharp keen as he adds to the mess that is D’s ass. Bro does give him clemency as Dave fights through the shudders to breathe before pulling him out of D and then pulling himself out of Dave.

“Aw, I was just gettin’ started.” Bro nudges Dave to the edge of the futon where he slumps halfway on the futon and half still on D, wanting the anchor of another person, before Bro helpfully tosses him over to land in the spot where Dirk had recovered. “Ya hardly even made use of D’s ass, you li’l shit. Should spank ya too, but you’d like it too much.” Bro glares down at the exhausted boy. Then his expression shifts into a grin. His hand pulls back and comes down on the awaiting ass in front of him, making D moan around Dirk’s cock at the continued abuse. He spanks D a few more times for the the hell of it. “See Davey, this would be your ass if ya hadn’t blown it so soon.”

Dave replies with a courtesy moan before his eyes flutter shut.

“Li’l shit,” Bro grumbles before looking back at the wreckage in front of him. He smiles and then groans as he slips into the vacancy Dave had just left. He immediately applies the same pace that he had been using through Dave, but this time he can feel the slipperiness inside from all the previous lube and cum.

D comes again with the tag team effort of Dirk and Bro fucking his holes and keeping up a steady stream of inappropriate descriptors about D and his depraved situation. Dirk comes to the soft whimpers of Bro fucking him through the heightened sensitivity and D has just enough of a mind to swallow some but not before it starts leaking out the side of his mouth. Dirk gently wipes some of it up and feeds it back to him, kissing him afterwards as Bro soon finishes and adds a fourth and final load to D’s ass.

Bro kisses the back of D’s neck as he carefully extracts himself. He quickly undoes the ankle straps as Dirk does the ones around his wrists. D carefully stands up with the help of his brothers. His face is covered with cum and spit, his legs are shakey, his ass is red, and he feels full, he can even feel it sliding a bit down his leg. Bro helps him around to the front of the futon and Dave scoots out of the way so they can lay him down. Dave fusses over D and shoos the other two away as he grabs a towel and a damp washcloth and begins cleaning D up. The coolness of the washcloth sooths D’s skin and soon he is nuzzling into Dave’s leg as Dave continues with the sweet and loving aftercare.

“So D, what exactly did you do to deserve this?” Dave finally asks after he is satisfied with D’s condition and has D’s head into his lap.

“Called him cute.”

“Ah that’ll do it.”

“Called me tsundere,” Bro calls over his shoulder.

“Ah, that’s why your ass is the color of a baboon’s then.” D whimpers and mumbles into Dave’s skin. Dave manages to catch something that sounds like “shut up.” Dave just laughs at him and drops the blanket over their shoulders just before Dirk comes over with a beer and two plates of pizza for them. As they rearrange to take the food and drink they can hear Bro typing away at the computer.

You know, Bro. Adding more layers of security really won’t help. I can crack those in seconds.

“Shuddup, Hal.”

Just letting you know you are wasting your time.

Instead of replying, Bro grabs his phone and starts texting.

TT: So, I need ya to do me a thing.   
TG: whatcha need boss   
TT: Theres a slightly sentient being that needs to be taken down a notch or ten.   
TG: omg whats has hal lalonde gotten into now   
TT: Ah. That actually explains a bit.   
TT: Gonna deal with ya and your corruptin ways later, Missy.   
TG: im shakin in my cute kitty boots   
TT: Ill go easy on ya if ya do this thing. With minimal questions. And high effectiveness.   
TG: thatll be easy consider it done

Bro smirks as he sets his phone down and goes back to his computer.

What did you just ask her to do? Bro? bro? um... wait. dirk! DIRK! roxy! no no NO WHAT ARE YOU DOING- The voice box on the sprite chassis lets out an undignified squeak.

Bro just smiles and tilts his head at him. “I have a feelin’ she just restricted all your internet access to clips, images, gifs, sounds, and what have you from Boku no Pico, cutie.”

There is another squeak before Hal dives for the computer himself to try to negotiate with his usual partner in crime.

D and Dave rearrange themselves one more time after they finish their pizza so that they are cuddled up next to each other on the futon. Dirk does the dishes before returning over and catching sight of Dave’s ass peeking out from under the blankets.

“Mmm, Dave, your plush rump looks so nice. Bet you’re jealous of how rosy red D’s ass is though. Unfortunately you really aren’t guilty of much beyond being a tease. I don’t have a good excuse to spank that ass besides a desire to see it glow.”

D lets out a high pitched whine and tucks his head into Dave’s shoulder. “No more, please god no more. My dick is going to fall off if any more sexy shit happens where I can see it hear it or feel it,” he beseeches. “Leave me alone. You don’t want to kill me do you!” he wails as he hears Dirk chuckle at him. “There’s only so much an old man can take.”

“No one’s died from bein’ oversexed, D,” Bro offers, waving a hand at the nonsense. “He kin take it.” D just lets out a sob and pulls Dave close and slightly on top of him. “Ya brought this on yourself, mister big shot director. Not our fault it didn’t go as scripted. Kin ya believe it? He started this whole thin’ already prepped for me. He wanted me to take his ass. Bit of a bit more than he could chew he now realizes,” Bro drifts off as he returns to squinting at the lines of code on his computer.

“Dave, Dave, Davey dear, you’ll protect me, won’t you, Davey?” D pulls back just enough to implore directly to his face.

“Are you kidding me? I wanna know your secrets so I can be just as well fucked.”

“Betrayal!” D dramatically flops away from him. “You foul betrayer. You just want them to spank you and be rough with you and fuck you until you can’t walk. Ugh. Never trust a masochist to save you from a sadist’s wrath.”

He freezes up when he hears Bro’s chair rolling away from the desk. Without looking all the way, he can feel Bro looming up over the futon.

“So how ya feelin’, big bro?”

“Is there a word for regret and contrition and please god have mercy on my ass? If not, there needs to be a word for that.”

Bro reaches down and grabs an ankle where a cuff was to massage the soreness away. D screams. Bro replies in deadpan, “I will rub bengay into your ass and really make you scream if you don’t stop that right now.”

The room goes silent. Even Hal pauses and quiets his fans. Dave swallows because not even as a masochist would he want that. That isn’t sexy, that is just pain.

From D’s buried position they can hear a whimpered, “Pineapple,” in the silence.

Bro heaves his shoulders in a heavy sigh. “C’mere ya big baby. Wouldn’t actually do that to ya. C’mon, no more. Your ass is done takin’ punishment tonight.” He drops the other side of the futon and lays down. He drags D on top of him, letting him rest his head on his chest and making sure his ass isn’t rubbing on anything that isn’t a soft blanket.

“Hey Bro?” D mumbles once they are situated.

“Hm?”

“Remember that one time you were upset because people thought you were my date in Hollywood?”

“Why da fuck are you brin’in’ that up now?”

“I just find it funny since all three of you just fucked me and you fucked me twice, you asshole.” D can feel Bro narrow his eyes down at the top of his head. “What would the tabloids say now, Derrick?”

“D’ya want me to get out a belt and start beatin’ your ass, D? ‘cause that’s where this is headed if ya dun shut da fuck up.”

“You guys were in a tabloid?” Dave asks, perking up beside them.

“This I want to see,” Dirk chimes in.

Found it! Hal chimes in with a squeaky voice that makes them all flinch before they turn their attention to the big screen.

“Imma kill a li’l sis,” Bro grumbles as the twins read over the terrible article about their Hollywood adventures. “And you’re lucky I already told ya I was done with ya for the night,” he growls at the Strider sprawled out across his chest.

“This wasn’t my fault. I was just thinking and you oversexed me and I forgot they didn’t know and yea...” he trails off. He pushes himself up just enough to get his face close to Bro’s to kiss his chin. “Please, Bro. Please no more punishments for this. Please, please?” He kisses and nibbles at what he can reach before Bro pushes his head away with a smile and a laugh.

“You’re safe, you’re safe. Let them live our glory days. Who gives a shit now?”

D relaxes back down on Bro’s chest with a happy sigh. It didn’t quite turn out like he planned but it was still good, even if he wouldn’t be sitting comfortably for at least a week.

**Author's Note:**

> For more information please check out our work at striderclan.tumblr.com; we have more stories, head canons, art/pictures.


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